an empty feeling of pain
by karlasfriskole
Summary: another one-shot about Fourtris. Tobias escapes Erudites HQ, but Tris is dead. can he live with that? i do still not (sadly) own the Divergent trilogy, but i am doing my best at heart-breaking one-shots! hope you like it.


His feet slammed against the ground in a fast, steady rhythm. Tobias couldn't hear anything but the sound of himself breathing, and the blood rushing in his ears. How could this have happened? He had promised her that he would protect her. He shouldn't have failed. He could feel the tears that now started to dry in the wind that hit him in the face, as he ran the fastest he could. It had been her last wish; to get himself to safety. He hadn't been able to carry her, and it wouldn't have mattered. She was already gone by the time he ran away. Tobias felt it like he had just ran away from the essence of his entire life. Tris.

 _Tobias hands had a firm grip on the gun in his hands, and he could hear Tris' running footsteps right behind him and a little to the right. It was comforting, but at the same time it made him want to fight his way out even more, now that he had her with him. They passed a corner, and he looked back at her to see if she was following, when suddenly she had stumbled backwards, with two holes in her chest. Tobias turned around and saw an ex-dauntless pointing his gun at Tris. He quickly shot the other guy, and dropped to Tris side. "Tris! Oh god, Tris." She looked up at him, with a look filled with so much pain, he almost couldn't bear to look her in the eyes. "get out of here, Tobias. Get to safety." Then she couldn't speak because of the coughing, and he held her in his arms, for one last time. Suddenly, she took a couple of shaky, troubled breaths, and then she stopped moving. Tobias felt cold and hot at the same time. "Tris? No, Tris wake up. Wake up! You're fine… you're fine" he picked her upper body up into his arms, and wrapped them around her. The pain flowed through his veins, as if it was a liquid that had physically mixed with his blood. He kissed her on the lips, and they were already starting to cool, as the dead stiffness set in, and her body stiffened. He put his forehead to hers, as he cried. It sent violent shakings through his body, and after a couple of minutes like that, he realized that if he didn't hurry, he couldn't do as she had wished. He got up, and tried to pick her up, but he couldn't. Or, he could get her up on his shoulder, but she was too heavy for him to carry. He had to leave her. Tobias pressed one last kiss against her forehead, and then he ran._

Tobias shook his head, to get rid of the terrible scene. He shortly after realized, that he had reached the hiding place of the factionless, and he stopped. He looked down at himself, and saw that he were covered in Tris' blood. A sudden fear rushed through him at the sight of the blood, and he tried to wipe his hands off in his pants, but the blood had dried too much. He stumbled in through the door, and collapsed on the floor. He was safe now. That was what she had wanted, and now that he had done as she wished, he could fall apart. The floor felt cool against the side of his head, and he curled up, with his knees against his chest. It wasn't until Christina came to his side, that he let them take him somewhere more private. The only one who stayed with him was Christina. She was crying, but it was soundless, so it was okay with him.

Days passed where Tobias didn't leave the room. He didn't feel like he had any reason to get up, or to leave. He just laid there, staring at the ceiling, thinking about her. She was all that had mattered, and now she had been ripped away from him. One day, he suddenly just felt like his body turned on autopilot. He got up, and packed his backpack with the few things that he owned: a gun, some clothes, the chip that had been implanted in Tris' shoulder, and his best memory about her - a scarf that she had given to him on their last date. He squeezed it tightly, and shut his eyes, trying not to cry. Oh god he missed her. The only feelings he had been able to feel the past days was pain, grief and love. He still loved her even though she was dead. How could he stop?

Tobias walked out of the room, and gathered a lot of food and water from where he could get it, then he went to the last place he needed to be, before leaving. Christina and Uriah sat on two beds opposite of each other. They both looked up with understanding in their eyes as they saw him. He nodded to them, and they both nodded back. They were dauntless. In dauntless there were no fuzzy goodbyes or tearful mourning time. Tobias walked out of the door, and away from the city that had taken his only love. The only person that had still been able to make him feel alive - whole. She was dead now, and so was every possibility of life here for him also. Goodbye Chigaco. And goodbye Tris Prior.


End file.
